Sunday, March 28, 2010

Parenting can be fun

We all would like to be parents. We have seen our parents how they have taken every care of us when we were small and we have got an urge in us to become parents and take care for our child.
Parenting isn’t easy job and it entails lots and lots of responsibilities and accountability. It is a fulfilling, deeply satisfying and yet a hard job. Parents face a lot of problems while managing their child. It could be related to child’s tantrums or teenage rebellious nature. From sex to drugs, parents have to tackle a vast course of contents. Indian family structure is still shy about several issues. Though, a beginning has been made in many families by the educated parents, yet there needs to be done a lot in this regard. Sometimes parents find themselves hapless because of so many challenges offered by parenting. One thing is sure, parents can never stop caring and worrying about their children. Even though, child grows up and becomes a mature adult yet parents will always care about them.
Parenting has several styles like democratic or authoritative or disciplinary etc. but whatever style parents choose to handle their kids, one thing will always be there at the core of parenting; the word ‘effective’. No matter, what style you choose, it has to be effective and honest. Parenting requires utmost honesty and sincerity. This is one job that can never be done with half-hearted effort. Children acquire utmost importance in the life of a parent.
Parents need to be very positive while dealing with their child. They are the ones who influence and motivate kid the most and they must take words and action seriously. Wrong words/deeds shown by them can affect child in negative way. Remember, your kid is always watching and learning from you.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Little ones

I like children. They are innocent.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Adolescence

Adolescence is an important phase linking childhood and adult life. Adolescence also means a time to dream and time to anticipate the unknown mysterious life ahead. Adolescence also means a time to hurry to accomplish and time to dare without thinking of the consequences. It is time to open new windows and see life in different shades of maturity.
Young people on the verge being adult but with childlike innocence do qualify as adolescents. They refuse to be treated like kids but since they can get influenced by peers and role models very easily, it is difficult to treat them as responsible adults.
The dilemma of adolescents is different. Their budding personalities, they are both intellectually and physically maturing and this makes their case very interesting. They seek importance like of an adult but they are financially dependent. They need extra food and sleep. They are often self conscious of their physical changes. Young people tend to spend more time in front of the mirror. They need appreciation and praise to build self-confidence. Doubting their ability, intention and action will only erode their confidence. They need a private space and time to evolve into thinking adults.
A little care needs to be taken in handling their emotions. Young people need correction but not punishment to know what is wrong and what is right. Their paths have many crossroads and they are forever confused about which path to take. A little guidance and support will make them matured adults. Negative vibes will force them to make impulsive decisions and they tend to have a reactionary attitude in life. Some have urgency to become financially independent, their attitude to take every adversity in stride and their silent maturity comes as a surprise. Young people tend to form ambition, friends and their general philosophy of life during their adolescent stage and it is seen that the outlook they adapt during this phase stays with them through their adult life as well, it only the attitude which changes when adult life teaches them to slow down and take responsibility for their action.

Monday, April 21, 2008

On teaching toddlers

When does learning process begin in toddlers? May be the moment they are born: they learn to cope up with new surroundings, with feeding and sleeping schedules, they quickly learn to read the minds of people who attend to them. They identify forbidden zones of home. So there is an inherent learning mechanism in place before they begin their formal education. Adults need to identify the learning abilities of the child before beginning lessons. Some may process image better than the sound. Some might prefer the ‘A B C’ song. But whatever the process maybe it is a difficult task to programme a human brain to learn and repeat. Teachers, parents work patiently around the learning barriers and get the brain hooked on to learning thro’ books and audio-visual media and the surrounding environment. Some kids get dedicated parents and teachers who help them in this but for many it is a big struggle and they get lost in the maze of letters, numbers and images for a while before finding best way to learn.
Making the child write is extremely challenging. Many parents become anxious and often end up feeling miserable. They try all books and methods yet their child is lagging behind the class-mates. The reason maybe very simple; the child is not yet ready for the writing lessons. Let the child draw lines and curves for a while. Try joining the dots exercise or even tracing helps. The fingers must learn to hold pencils and move freely to draw letters. Use of black or white boards can be useful. It becomes less of a struggle if we make teaching, learning a fun activity rather than a strict regime.
Education takes many years and sustaining interest in learning and writing can be difficult too. In later schooling years reading, writing is no longer a fun activity. Then it is an individual’s struggle with the self to give up fun to finish assignments and worry about assessments. Maybe it helps to make a habit of reading and writing early in life. After all schooling and education are the roots of individual’s growth in modern society. Make the soil fertile and sow a healthy seed and watch growing shoots and branches.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Juvenile Crimes

Cruel children?
These words don’t look good together…but in our modern world they do come together, as in juvenile crimes!! There have been many incidents recently in the media like school campus shooting, drug abuse, both in India and in other countries. In all the incidents adolescents were involved but it was clearly a case of uncontrolled anger manifesting as crime. Can we identify these kids at an earlier age? Can this anger be channelized into something else? Child psychiatrists surely know how to identify and deal with such kids but normally parents don’t take unruly kids for counseling. They take a strict measure at home, which only worsens child’s state of mind. Anger keeps simmering at subconscious level and finally manifests as a serious crime at a later stage of life.
Go to primary section of any school and interact with the parents and they’ll tell many tales of bully kids. Bully kids beat up class mates, they bite, scratch, even kick and use bad abusive language. They imitate super human cartoon characters and try to assert their strength in a world where they are taken for granted and forever reprimanded by teachers and parents and most elders. They invent enemies within friends and can be cruel with soft kids for almost no reason at all. This behavior doesn’t need punishment. Patient parenting can do wonders. It is easy to manipulate young minds. In most instances closer look at these vulnerable minds reveal many problem areas. Most often they have difficulty in coping and sharing with their peers at school or outside school. They may have learning difficulty. Or they simply emulate from what they see in television and media. Identifying their weakness is very important. Anger takes birth from frustration. Only weak make extra effort to assert their strength. Telling them physical strength alone doesn’t make a person winner or loser may work. Being selective about what channels they surf and introducing music, dance or art as a hobby can channelize negative emotions. Nipping anger at a budding stage is essential.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Dyslexia

My toddler son did show some symptoms of dyslexia but he understands the problem very clearly and is doing very well for himself...the other day he came running to me after school exams and said,''I have written all 'd's and 'b' s correctly, didn't mix up!"
The kids have amazing mechanism of coping up and their brains rewire almost instantly if explained properly.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Parenting the parents!!

Sometimes it is fun to allow kids to be our parents!!!
For instance on some days I insist on my son staying back with me on school days and he explains to me that he can't simply miss the school!!! He tells me everyone got to do some study and work and off he goes without any tantrums to school and on returning gives me a big hug saying,"did you miss me? I am so sorry"